Failure first hand
Today I received notification that I failed a subject that I worked my butt off to pass. To make matters worse, I am currently on probation – if I don’t negotiate a second opportunity I’m out and my university career is over.
- I have two choices: sit and cry like a baby or move forward, as hard as it is. Trust me, it’s not a good fucking feeling. Life will often try to beat you. We can sit here and let it beat the shit out of us or get up and win when the next opportunity presents itself.
- Here is the thing – we all get advice from people who read fancy motivational books. These people make it their own and endeavour to motivate you from a position of moral high ground as if they had supposedly walked the path. Bullshit! They read a fancy book and parrot the trite content on to others.
- Take advice from people who failed and who walked the steep path of great resistance wherever they went and got knocked over, but they stood up with the spoils in the bag.
- Don’t get me wrong – reading is great. I am an avid bookworm myself and believe that self-improvement builds our leadership abilities and promotes growth. I am just anti people who lack any first-hand experience speaking with authority on a subject and criticising those who have earned their stripes the hard way.
- When you fail, take time to cry. Be pissed off. Rant and rave. But don’t pitch a camp in that space. I know it’s hard and beyond difficult. But, when you have made up your mind to go at it again and face the dragon, it’s a very liberating feeling.
- Most importantly, you need to talk about your failures and how they make you feel to your loved ones. Those you can trust. You need to have a safe place to download. It will also make you real and give you credibility (to others and also in your own eyes). Futhermore, it gives you the required perspective so that you can plan your emotional path forward and how to tackle this dragon the second time around.
- This is where the tyre hits the tarmac. Be brave mate and don’t be afraid of being judged. This is your life – don’t live it in fear of others’ opinions.
- I know its fucking difficult, but we have choices to make – are we going to pass with cum laude or are we going let our business rivals walk away with the money? (This holds true in any situation of failure – not just when writing exams).
- My point is, it’s easy for people to say, “Keep going, it will be okay, don’t worry about it”, but are they in your position? Were they ever there? Do they have any idea what your struggle is about?
- If those people have no ambition, or if they judge you, then my advice is to let them go and go at it alone.
- Maybe you are like me who must work harder for longer to make it happen than your colleagues, friends or spouse. That is okay. We all run our own race.
- It is crucial that you surround yourself with people that understand; genuine people who care about your well being and allow you to be who you are, not trying to put you in a mold of their own design and not judging you for your choices either, whether they agree with them or not.
- That is my success formula for getting up again. If you don’t have people like these around you, call me.. you not alone…